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Exit Interview with God

(Dawn Isbell Wilson)

It has always disturbed me how some parents, children, or friends can calmly accept an idea that their loved ones might burn for an ETERNITY while they walk the streets of gold, playing harps, or whatever. It’s sad that so many millions of people cling to the cruellest, most horrendous god belief because they are afraid of hell. You have to be some kind of monster, yourself, to truly worship a god that would have created eternal torment for finite crimes. Especially, the crime of disbelief. If I actually believed for one moment that…wait, I honestly did believe it. For three years, from the age of 12 to 15, I was tormented by the idea of my family being tortured forever and ever. Their only crime? Disbelief. I was willing to suffer that same fate because the idea of a heaven without them was unthinkable to me. When I left the church, I fully believed I would go to hell and I didn’t care because I was done worshipping a monster.

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Verse
Every night she prays and grieves
Begs her God not to condemn 
Her children left the faith behind
She’ll go to heaven without them

Chorus
I’ve lived my life the best I could
Through good times and the bad
But the hardest thing I’ll ever do
Is go to heaven without you
You’ll be below, I’ll be above
I’m sorry my fear outweighs my love

Verse
When they wed, they both believed
But she let her faith unwind
Now he grieves what he can’t change
He’ll go to heaven, leave her behind

Chorus
I’ve lived my life the best I could
Through good times and the bad
But the hardest thing I’ll ever do
Is go to heaven without you
You’ll be below, I’ll be above
I’m sorry my fear outweighs my love

Verse
I was saved when I was twelve
At Christian camp one summer
My family, they were Atheists
So that was quite a bummer

Bridge
For three years I lived in fear
Imagining them in hell
Eternal pain for those I loved
And I knew it didn’t sit well
I prayed alone and with my friends
But nothing changed at home
Heaven had no place for them
So, I wouldn’t go there alone

Outro
One quiet night I spoke to God
My love outweighed my fear
Heaven would be hell for me
Without the ones I hold most dear

© Dawn Isbell Wilson 2025

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