Chump Change

(Tom Barlow)

We're all become familiar with the cliche, the billionaire with the trophy wife on his arm and another beauty stashed away just in case. But what happens when that second relationship sours? This light-hearted take on a relationship gone bad should please those who can only dream of such wealth.

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Who bought you a Lamborgini? Bought your first Versace? Took you to the south of France? Equipped you with Hitachi? I gave you Number five Chanel From Tiffany’s an emerald ring The penthouse at the Ritz Hotel The Met to teach you how to sing. Chorus: I give you diamonds I give you gold You give me a headache Leave me out in the cold For what I’m paying it sure seems strange That all you’re giving me is chump change Chump change All you’re giving me is chump change. Who paid for the saline twins? A gram or two for lonely nights? A Lichtenstein print of your Mom A Shar-pei with an overbite. Front row at the Cats revival A drunken pledge to Jerry’s Kids A painless scrape, a tummy tuck, Just name one thing I forbid. Chorus There are speed burns on my credit cards The statements run from page to page Through your fingers money flies By like digits on the gas pump gauge It’s a buyer’s market can’t you tell And you’ve reached expiration; They’re lining up against the bar All promise and expectation. Chorus

© Tom Barlow 2018

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