Destruction Lies

(Indya Renee)

An introspectively raw piece of material originally written as a spoken word piece in relation to the writers experience, strength, hope and wisdom.

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Tick tick tick 
The sound of my beating heart
A ticking time bomb... destruction lies I'm a push to start
My words a self filling prophecy?
Nah it's just art...my words penetrate the hate infiltrates but love carries me since I cannot walk

I am but a bomb waiting to tick
Lyrics waiting to spit
A fist waiting to hit
A hand held out waiting to get
A casino waiting to bet
A chair waiting to sit

Tick tick tick
Click click click
I am not a gun I am the tip at the end
What is life without strife what is a blade without the knife
What would wrong be if there was no right
What colors can you see if your eyes are shut wide

I been sleep all my life 
My eyes squint at the light waking up to reality...screaming on the inside
Confusion and ignorance submerged in lies and false pride...
Love meant nothing 
Love was a lie
Love was denied
Love saved my life
To love and lose is better than to hate and get by

She was a gift from the God up above
Precious cargo she is pure as a dove
The only experience I truly felt loved
Was in her heart in her warmth
...I felt like someone

The sadness in her eyes I can't help but to cry...I don't wanna die I wanna be right by her side

Everything is alright 
Promise she'll be alright
Wolves can cry I cried so many times
Now lost in the gap between left and right
A broken record 
A lost sheep 
A motherless child

Blessings blessings blessings
Thank you I'm still alive
Thank you for another chance
Thank you for not leaving my side

Words and intent...I misused them alot
I had no idea til now how much my word 
has power

86 that writing that says I'll end a tragic life
Because I am not enough for the Christians or The nots
I don't have enough knowledge to dissect and fall in line
So being still I will
I know my God is on my side

Love I don't know 
Love I don't show
Love I need to live
Love I want to give

I am not afraid...but Lord I am dismayed
Confusion had me stuck 
Doing the same things over again

Now they know my name
I do not want this fame
I do not do not want to play these games

Word. 
Mine means nothing
Heart.
Still the same
Status
A fallen child jumped head first into change
Who decieved the grave 
Begging to be saved 
No one is coming to save me 
No one wants to play

Cards. Been dealt. Been folded. Been raised.
Some laugh at my downfall
Some give God praise...
I'm still here for some reason 
Taking life day by day
Tainted and now jaded but my heart's still the same
© Indya Renee 2019